A few months ago, I posted a top 10 list of reasons why I won’t be nominated for domestic engineer of the year.  This week I thought I’d expand upon that list by adding my…

Top 10 Reasons I Won’t Be Nominated for Mom of the Year

10)  I don’t think I brushed Little C’s hair all weekend.  My 3-year-old daughter has gorgeous blonde hair running down her back, hair that is so beautiful that I’ve only had it trimmed twice in her lifetime.  But that means daily maintenance.  A weekend without brushing means a weekend full of painful and unsightly tangles.  My daughter looked like a  ragamuffin by Monday.

9)  I don’t think I brushed her teeth all weekend either. 

8)  I started the “10 minutes of cleaning rooms before bedtime” rule but most nights I’m too tired to enforce it.  Therefore, the kids’ rooms are disaster areas.

7)  I sometimes wish I could do Big C’s 1st grade homework for him so we could finish it in under an hour.

6)  I spilled wine on Little C’s zebra mask she made at school, and instead of explaining to her why the black paint was bleeding, I hid the mask until I was sure she didn’t notice its disappearance and then buried it in the trash.

5)  I was relieved when the neighbors invited both kids over for a playdate not because I knew the kids would have fun, but because it meant I had a couple of hours to myself.

4)  Both kids refused to eat breakfast one morning, and instead of forcing them to eat, I let them go to school with empty bellies.  I’m no good at tough love.

3)  I spent Big C’s last soccer game catching up with a friend instead of watching him play.  At least I didn’t miss much.  He spent half the game catching up with a friend on the field instead of kicking the ball.

2)  It’s mid-October, and I still haven’t bought a pumpkin.  And thanks to the never-ending bathroom remodel and equipment blocking my attic entrance, I still don’t have Halloween decorations out either.

1)  According to Big C, I am the worst mother in the world because I didn’t allow him to camp out in his friend’s backyard.  To my defense, my Big C is 6 years old, and the participants in the camp out were ages 8 and 11.  The host’s father DID NOT sleep in the tent with them, and I saw their flashlights still flashing at 10:30 PM, while Big C was fast asleep at 8 PM.  Bad mom or responsible mom?  I guess it’s just the beginning of tough parental decisions.

What job of the year will you NOT be nominated for?


13 Comments on Top 10 Reasons I Won’t Be Nominated for Mom of the Year

  1. Awwhh, I am sure you are a wonderful mother. This is the time where they are allowed to have knotted hair and hate you because they can't camp out. I am sure they are loving you for the lack of enforcement on the cleaning rule. Lol.
    Great top ten as usual!

  2. Absolutely LOVE all your honesty! I am guilty of ALL of the above myself…even the campout part! Ian actually went to school this morning with bread in his hand while he was riding his bike. Bread is better then nothing right?

    My kids always find their school art work in the trash and pull it out and ask how it got in there? I of course, deny deny deny!!!!

    3 more days until your weekend!

  3. These don't make you a bad mom, they make you human! I can not imagine having children and teaching and being a military spouse. You are amazing!

  4. You're a wonderful mom. A very honest one too. I think every mom feels that way though and they forget to do certain things. Don't be so hard on yourself. =)

    I will not get daughter of the year. I've been terrible not calling my mom that often (I blame it on work though)

  5. buahahahaha…thanks for that! I posted about being mother of the year sometime last year! I fed my kids "Chef" and gave them diet pepsi for dinner, only because I was too tired to take them to burger king!

    So, yeah, your list just makes me feel human!!!

  6. I've done #6, but it involved spilling wine on a spelling list due the next day. So I am in the running right there with you, sister. Cheers! *Clink*

  7. I adore you! You are so real… and downright hilarious.

    I'm sure you're a wonderful mom. I can't imagine how difficult it is to teach kindergarten AND come home to two as young as yours.

    I keep telling my husband that I have to find a new career path before we have children. Being surrounded by kids all day, especially ones that aren't your own is exhausting! You're amazing.

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