Kids say the funniest things, don’t they?  And I think it’s my duty as a parent to write them all down and periodically share them on my blog.

The other day I was cleaning out my Word documents and found the list I started about a year ago of the funny things that come out of my kids’ mouths.  It was so much fun to reread their quotes and relive those moments.  You probably won’t find them as hilarious as I do because sometimes you just have to be there, but reading every single one of these again cracks me up.

Here are my…

Top 10 List of My Kids’ Cutest Quotes

Big C = 7 year old boy
Little C = 4 year old girl
Little C playing with her princess diving sticks in the bathtub: “I’ll save you Princess!” said in a husky prince voice. 
“No thanks,” she replied in her princess voice.  “I will help myself.”


Me to Big C as he chews on a vitamin that I didn’t give him: “How did you open the vitamin bottle?  It’s childproof.”
Big C: “I read the directions on the cap.”

Me to both kids as Mr. RC tries to get some work done on the computer: “Don’t bother Daddy.  He needs peace and quiet.”

Little C screaming as she runs around the house trying to find him: “I’ll bring him peace and quiet!!!!!!!!!!”

Big C after falling off his bike: “I hate gravity.”

Me in response to Little C mumbling in the backseat of the car: “Are you talking to yourself?”
Little C, nodding: “Myself knows what I mean.”

Big C looking at a book: “I think this picture is of Mars.  But no one has ever been there before.”

Me: “How do you know that?”

Big C: “I read it in the newspaper.”

Me: “You did?!”

Big C: “No I’m just kidding…I read it in the Economist.”


Little C pretending to be a waitress: “Mommy, what do you want to order?”

Me: “I want to order no screaming, screeching, shrieking, or whining.”

Little C: “You can’t buy that.  We don’t sell that here.”


Me after Big C’s baseball practice: “Big C, you have a great swing, but you have to keep your eye on the ball.”

Big C: “I do Mom.”

Me: “But you need to watch the ball come all the way to you.”

Big C: “But Mom, I can’t.  That’s when I close my eyes.”


Me on a particularly whiny day: “Honey, why do you whine so much?”

Little C: “So I can put you out of business.”


Me on one of my longer days: “I’m done being a mommy today.”
Big C: “You can’t quit.  You’re going to be a Mom forever.  Even in your grave, you’re going to be a Mom.”
Do you write down the silly, funny, precocious things your kids say?  What are some of the best of your kid quotes?

13 Comments on Top 10 List of My Kids’ Cutest Quotes

  1. I was visiting my parents with my kids. My mom & dad started bickering over something, and it was obvious that my mom wasn't too pleased with my dad. LB, three years old at the time (and quoting Phineas & Ferb), turns to my dad and says, "You are so busted."

    It pretty much dissolved any tension in the room immediately! 🙂

  2. I love writing down the crazy stuff my kids say! In fact, I got this one just last week:
    Son (5): "We didn't have school 'cause of that milk holiday."
    Dad: "There's no milk holiday. What are you talking about?"
    Son: "In my folder. It said MILK."
    Dad: "M-L-K. That's Martin Luther King!"

  3. Hahaha!! Those are great!!! I never, ever thought about kids being able to read the directions on the child proof caps! That is absolutely hilarious! Note to manufacturers…

    And I totally understand how Big C feels about gravity. =P

    • I know, I never thought about directions on childproof caps either. But my son reads EVERYTHING now. Gotta start being aware of things I write down now. 😉

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