I am the perfect mother. I never yell at my angelic children. I serve only nutritious meals and snacks. I read 10 books a day and do daily art projects with the little angels. I possess a limitless supply of patience, and I’m never tired. And I certainly don’t indulge in time to myself because the children need my constant nurturing.
And if you believe that, stick around for my Oscar acceptance speech.
Although I may sometimes wish to be that kind of mom, I’m well aware that I’m not. Anyone who says she is that kind of mom is either lying or has a nanny, nutritionist, chef, personal trainer, housekeeper, masseuse, and therapist on call 24 hours a day. Because I’m not that mom, I can’t help but feel guilty for those nagging transgressions that make me the kind of mom I swore I would never be.
What mama guilt can I lay on myself from the last week? Oh, let me count the ways…
I feel guilty for watching my 2-year-old Little C savor a spinach and feta filled hamburger, twice baked potato casserole, and mozzarella and tomato salad, while my 6-year-old Big C chokes down sauce-less meatballs and half a banana. How did I allow Big C to develop such abysmal eating habits?
I feel guilty for threatening Big C that we would leave the YMCA with or without the treasured toy he lost, making him fight tears in front of his macho buddies. (Thank goodness we found that stupid Gormiti, or else I’d really
earn the World’s Worst Mommy Award.)
I feel guilty for focusing so much more attention on Little C than Big C, not only because she’s younger and isn’t as independent, but because she’s just so darn naughty.
I feel guilty for wishing Little C would sleep a little longer so I could cuddle alone with Big C in the early morning’s peace and quiet.
I feel guilty for putting the kids to bed early because I was tired.
And I feel guilty for not knowing what to tell the kids about their daddy’s impending deployment.
Now that I got that off my chest, let me go cook up an organic snack while I read the kids an entire chapter book, lay down the newspaper for fingerpainting, make the rain stop so we can play outside, and squeeze in a 5 mile run all with a smile on my very patient face.