Last week I wrote about my indecisiveness as it related to my career (or lack thereof). But there’s another area of my life that’s affected by my indecision: writing.
My academic degrees are completely unrelated to writing. But I have always loved the art of the written word and hoped that someday I could pursue writing in some way, shape, or form in my free time. Years ago, I wrote a children’s book, which brought me nothing but a year’s worth of rejection letters. I have a folder overflowing with children’s poetry and short fiction that brought me another year of rejection letters (although year #2 of rejection was largely hand-written, encouraging, and constructive). I’ve been stuck on Chapter 4 of a novel for over a decade. And I have a second novel completely written. In my head.
I told you, I’m indecisive.
This year, I decided to finally make a decision about my writing. I need to stop talking about writing and start writing. Thus, the birth of my blog. I figured a blog would get my creative juices flowing and get me into the habit of writing on a daily basis so the thought of dusting off my old, forgotten projects wouldn’t seem so daunting.
In the 5 months I’ve been blogging, I’m finding that yes, my creative juices are flowing. However, they’re mostly flowing into my blog. Those forgotten projects remain forgotten, still collecting dust. I love blogging, but it’s not getting me any closer to a book deal.
On the other hand, blogging has opened doors that I never even considered knocking on. Freelance writing for an audience other than children never occurred to me, but thanks to my blog, I’ve found my first real writing successes in the freelance world. Although I’m thrilled to have these opportunities, they have also added to my indecision.
Should I cut down on my blogging to spend more time working towards publication? Should I use that time to revise my children’s book and start resubmitting to publishers? Should I try to continue novel #1 or squeeze novel #2 out of my head and onto paper? Or should I pursue freelance writing, a field which I already have a pinky toe in? Is it possible to do it all?
I know what my gut is telling me to do. But do I have the guts to follow it?