I’m conducting a little informal survey for a piece I’m working on for Blue Star Families, and I have a quick question for all you mil spouses/significant others out there…(and I know that some of you already shared your thoughts on my FB page and Twitter so if you have, no need to answer again)
What do you think are some positive things about deployments?
Before my husband leaves, we make a list of things that we are going to do when he comes home. The deployment goes into savings and we don't touch it. I like watching the number grow and knowing that after 12 months, we're gonna have one heck of a vacation.
I also personally like that when he is gone, I can do things that I normally wouldn't do. Lots of girl time and chick flicks.
Since we don't have kids, it gives me a chance to really give extra at work. I can bust my a$$ without feeling like I'm neglecting my husband. It makes up for all the time I'll need off when he gets home. 🙂
The opportunity to learn to be self-sufficient. You are FORCED to do things that you'd normally just say to your spouse, "hey, can you do this for me."
Like fixing faucets and doing some carpentry.
I think that although deployments are tough, they really put things into perspective. During the time that my husband has been gone I have learned to be a strong and independent person. I have had to handle things all on my own that normally I would have his help with, and although its scary at times, it has increased my confidence in myself. Its also good because it really teaches you to value your spouse, and realize that every moment is precious in this life. I think it has helped us both grow as individuals, as well as strengthened our marriage and love for one another.
You can save money, really learn who you are as a person, become closer to your friends.
One thing I like during deployments is the fact that we can only talk or write. We really get to know each other on another level. I honestly would learn something new about him everytime he would leave. It helps out relationship grow froms something just physical.
I also like the chance of doing something different that I wouldn't do when he is home.
Since my husband has been gone, ive leared to be completely independent and do evrything on my own. its seemed that anything that could go wrong has. from family,friends, cars, money, jobs, everything..has gone wrong. and he hasnt been here to fix. so ive done it all on my own. also, weve saved all of the money so thats always a plus! and i really think we have grown as a couple…and gotten to kno eachother on a deeper level…
It allows the wives left at home to become stronger women. We learn to do everything ourselves. I think it also allows us to appreciate each other more. So many couples re together all the time, that they take each other for granted. Military couples don't have that problem!
While my husband is away, it's easier for us to save money. Yes, we have two children, but we don't go out to eat as often, there is no extra food in the fridge that doesn't need to be in there, and video games and electronic are put on hold. We also find ourselves growing even more in love and anticipating the day of his return. We know that each other is worth the wait. We learn from one another, and we see each other in a different light. It really strengthens our love.
1. Saving the Mulah!$$$
2. working on personal goals you have for yourself… (I have lost 50 pounds since hubby has left!)
3. Learning to do things on your own.. I have been dependent on him for 3 years and this was a rude awaking!
Saving money is always a plus, and it gives some extra time for me to do things I want to do…watch the movies I want, take my time shopping for things I want…on my time 🙂 which is nice!
Thanks for the awesome comments everyone! You really helped me!
Never had one…LOL. There is a positive?> Yayyy! LOL
I haven't had one yet, but at least during boot camp (YES, I know it's not the same thing but we were apart).. I would say saving money is a big one, but it's also taught me who I am as a person.
My husband just got back from his deployment and everything that could go wrong, did. I thought that was just a saying wives liked to say, but it's so true. I had to deal with everything from a death in the family that required me to fly cross-country for, to fixing a nail in my car's tire. He's not around to ask his opinion or have him help out with anything, so it makes me become more self sufficient and rely on help from friends and family.
Aside from learning to do things that my husband normally does, like mow the lawn, fix leaky/broken things… I always enjoyed getting the chance to focus on some of the other relationships in my life, like my friendships and relationships with family.
It may sound weird, but I think getting a chance to miss my spouse is something special. A lot of people don't spend much time away from their spouses. During deployment, I really see all that my husband does for me and how much he contributes to our household, which is not as easy to see when they are there every day.
I think there are absolutely zero positive aspects about deployments.
After we PCS to Alaska, we will be looking at our 6th deployment.
Confidence, Independence, and the feeling of accomplishment. We have only been through one deployment, but I had all those feelings.
And, it may sound shallow, but the money. We were able to grow our savings significantly.