Dear Summer Vacation,
Please hurry up and get here. I have 8 days left of school, and my students are bouncing off the walls, misbehaving, and generally making me wonder if there’s any point in teaching them because they’re no longer paying any attention to me. I will miss my students once you arrive, but I’m ready to read more, write more, and sleep more!
Dear Harry Potter,
Please stop being so mesmerizing. I’ve been reading you to my 8-year-old son, but he’s so obsessed with your story that he’s reading ahead of me. I’m at the beginning of the second book. He’s about to finish the third. And he’s telling me everything that happens!
I’ve accepted the fact that I will spend most of my mornings wrestling my kids’ toys out of your mouth and shushing you as you bark incessantly at the invisible enemies in our backyard at 6 AM, but for goodness sakes, my patio table is not a sofa.
Dear Mother of One of My Students,
You know when you were a kid and you ran into your teachers at the grocery store and thought how weird that was? Well, on Friday I ran into you and your daughter. At the gym. In the locker room. Where I was wearing a towel. I think that tops the grocery store for weirdness. So let’s pretend that never happened, shall we?
Dear Fifty Shades of Grey,
Wow. That’s all I have to say about that.
Dear Wedding Anniversary,
Cheers to another year you fell on a day that I am husband-less. Here’s to hoping next year our 13th will be spent in the same time zone.